Someday

Every little girl dreams of living a fairytale. Having our "someday when I grow up" moment. We dream about the day when we finally meet the man of our dreams, fall in love, and begin our lives. As we grow into the people we were meant to be we find our dreams morph into other things. We obsess over making friends, where to hide our report cards, and before you know it were back to trying to find the best prom date. Eventually, we find our match, get married, and have children of our own.

Tonight, after a long conversation with my parents, I've decided to compose my thoughts here. We didn't just talk about marriage, though that is the topic that has weighed heavily on my shoulders lately. All of those that I graduated high school with are getting married, having babies, and some are even getting divorced. Meanwhile, I'm still trying to decide what to I'm going to do with the rest of my life.

I've decided to take a minute and write a letter to my future husband, whom ever he may be.

 

You have taken on a lot, considering you've agreed to marry me. I scream, cry, and sometimes it's enough to just breath. I will twist your words and actions into something they are not simply because that's how my brain works. I will struggle to trust you. Not because you are unworthy, but because my trust has been misguided. I hope that you will see my flaws and realize that they are the bad you have to take with the good. I pray that you will love me through my dark days and celebrate the good ones. I am not the easiest person to love or even get along with at times, but I will make you a promise.

 

I promise to always be honest with you; tell you what's on my mind even if you don't want to hear it. I will try my damnedest to put my trust and love in you without second guessing my own instinct. You have chosen to care for me, spend the rest of your life with me, and most importantly, you have chosen to love me. There is no way for me to express how much that means to me.

 

Here's to you and our someday!